Monday, July 16, 2007

Oh Crap! I guess its my turn.

Its my turn for an invasion. An invasion of ants. Baby ants, too. It must be the season.

I've been here just under two years and have only encountered a scout or two in the bathroom or by the front door. This morning when I got up I noticed a bunch of pepper on the counter. "What the h....?" I grabbed my glasses and took a closer look. The pepper was moving. Moving all over the counter. "Oh YUCK!! OH 'CRAP'!!"
('Crap' is in single quotes because thats not really the word I used.) "ANTS... and not the cute ones from the movie, either!!"

I glanced around looking for something to use. Nothing. Then I grabbed one of my sandals off my foot and started battering the he..ck out of them. I'm all for nature, but keep it outside, would ya. Bang. Bang-Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang-Bang-Bang.

After about ten minutes the 'pepper' all stayed in one place. I got some paper towels, wet it, and started cleaning up the carnage. Bang. A survivor or two. Bang. Bang. "Oh yuck oh yuck oh yuck. Creepy Creepy Creepy."

Then I noticed a herd of them along the baseboard... in a corner where my sandal could not get to them. Adrenaline rush. What to use.... What to use? What could any self-respecting woman use when she doesn't have any poison in a can?? It didn't matter. All that mattered was that I had a can that sprayed.... so I used it. And used it. And used it some more. If I couldn't get to them with my sandal I would drown them in air freshner.

Oh sure, you may be laughing and feeling all mentally smug because I sprayed them with air freshner...... but it was Air Wick. Thats right... Air Wick Air Freshner. And anyone who has ever used Air Wick knows that you can't breath afterwards. So I got a few more under control. They'll be the best smelling corpses around.

Oh creepy creepy. Whaaaa!!

4 comments:

Sandy said...

funny commentary about ants and I think I have used some cheap air freshener before too, when I grabbed something real quick to spray...

The Crusty Crone said...

You know what the bad part is about this? Ants try to carry the corpses away.... you know, like friends and buddies would do. oh lordy.

Sandy said...

That's sad! Stop it.!!! LOL

Sue J said...

Ants are a pain in the bum, and I can sympathize entirely. I'm getting a break of sorts at the moment because it's winter, but I still get a few in. I spray them, inside, with diluted Jaysol in a spray bottle. Works a treat; I like the smell and there are no fumes to deal with.