Saturday, August 18, 2007

Smart-assed Oracle!!

Its been like over a decade since I've been into a Starbucks. (the author notices her nose is growing.) Well, more like seven years, okay. Anyway, someone has created a Starbucks Oracle guaranteed to be 100% accurate. Here's what I got:

Personality type: Ass-clown

You tell people that you're an executive at your company. You think that your repeated references to being "addicted" to caffeine make you seem intriguing and dangerous. People think you're a sucker because you spend 60% of your annual income at Starbucks. Everyone who drinks Venti Latte with extra shot ends up addicted to crack.

Also drinks: Zima
Can also be found at: Karaoke bars


After laughing, I read it again. Without being pretentious or anything, this Oracle needs to go back to oracle school or something. I would never go to a karaoke bar!!

On a different note, here's an aside... after watching a few days of interviews it seems the latest language fad is to say "yeahyeahyeah". Maybe it will take the place of "like" or worse, just be added to it. Such important news... yeahyeahyeah, I had to share it!

5 comments:

Sandy said...

Hey!!! I think I drew your oracle!!! And besides being a smart ass...she's a scammer..

funny post..kareoke..hahaha.

yeah yeah yeah...

I Am said...

HEY NOW... I would go to a kareoke bar, I never have but I would... oh wait, I forgot I did go to my friends in Nashville last time, BUT I WAS A JUDGE so that dosent count... I also like starbucks lattes, and I treat myself every few months...

I admit I am a coffee snob...
And I need help..............

The Crusty Crone said...

'i am'... don't be so quick to call yourself a snob... or maybe being a snob is okay if its for a reason other than a label or brand name.

One of my daughters worked for Starbucks many many moons ago. She said they worked very hard to maintain consistency in their products. They roasted their own beans and were very careful about the roasting process. Their barista (sp?) training was very thorough and detailed. I don't remember all she said, but I remember I was impressed. And after four or five times of going to a local coffee bar and walking out with scorched milk in my crummy coffee, I came to appreciate Starbucks quality. (this local coffee bar started hiring college kids and turnover was high. They didn't give a shit.) I may not get a latte any more, but I do buy the brand in the store... when its on sale.

You're not a snob. Your a conissoure... and I can't spell that either. I can barely pronounce it. (I added an "e" at the end of the word so it wouldn't end in 'sour'. I crack me up!!)

I Am said...

That is what I am, I am a connoisseur

I buy the starbucks brand too for home, WHEN ITS ON SALE, I actually buy three of four at a time when its on sale, and I keep them in the freezer. I use that Coffee Toddy thingy that I've been harping on for a couple of years that I think is so great!!!, the coffee is perfect when made with it... Cold press coffee never heated till you add the hot water. Because it is concentrated... Every time I fix someone a cup of that stuff they RAVE that it taste just like going to star bucks... (grin)... No heat no acid or bitter taste...
Google COFFEE TODDY. And you will see what I am talking about...

You could steep it in a milk jug or something like that for 12 hours and then filter it slowly through a coffee pot I guess just to see if you like it tastes made that way... you put 1 pound of coffee to 1 half gallon of water and let it steep for 12 hours then drain it, throw away the grounds and keep the concentrated coffee in the fridge and use about 1/4 cup of coffee and the rest water, try it...

Wanda said...

yeahyeahyeah! Thanks for sharing!